I know that men have difficulty trying to understand women and I can truly appreciate how mysterious we must seem. I am a women and I am often surprised by the cravings and notions that come to me out of nowhere and then become firmly planted in my consciousness as the gospel truth in no time at all.
These thoughts become firm directives as to how my life should proceed and I trust them completely. It has been this way my whole life. I have often wondered if men get these flashes. I honestly don’t think so. I do believe that women are basically intuitive beings and will give the tiniest whim a chance. I have learned that paying attention to these random thoughts often allows them to turn into full blown fantastic epiphanies. I really don’t think that men have epiphanies that much. They have to contemplate and formulate their thoughts and then toss out the ones they don’t like without a second thought. That’s where they go wrong. We women can sense the gift that even the most whacky idea can produce. We don’t dismiss ideas as frivolous or foolish, we embrace them and keep them safe for when we need to use them in our lives no matter how long it takes. Our method of resurrecting ideas from our “brain vault” lets us have more options.
If I’ve lost you, let me try to catch you up more simply. Let’s face it, women are the shoppers. Most of us can find items to buy whether at Wal-Mart or Saks. If you are anything like me, you might find me at any time wearing a $3.99 tank top from K-Mart with a $100 pair of pants from Bloomingdales and don’t be surprised if my cute little cardigan that tops it all off came from a neighborhood garage sale. See what I mean? A man on the other hand, would be more inclined to buy suits, shirts, ties, and socks all from the same store, all at the same time. I am sorry that I had to use shopping and clothing to get my point across, I honestly tried to come up with something more cerebral to explain all this, but there was no excerpt from a Shakespearean play or a quote from one of the master philosophers that even came close.
When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a queen. That idea never left my being. When I grew up, I realized that there were no countries needing my royal services, so I became the queen of bras and lingerie. See what I am saying? I knew I would be queen someday because it came into my head when I was hanging on the playground bars upside down at Toluca Lake Elementary School. It was a good idea when I was in the second grade and it is a good idea now. I took the queenly path and adjusted it to work for my life. The point is that I am still a queen. Period.
To my darling guys out there, I am not bashing you in any way. I respect your methods, but I don’t understand them. Men seem to be able to dismiss ideas systematically. They don’t give into thoughts that are not “do-able” in their estimation. It amazes me that these same creatures who can toss away a valuable idea that might serve them well in the future under different circumstances, cannot be forced to part with any of their zillions of decades-old sports and concert t-shirts. Any of you who have husbands or boyfriends can probably attest to having one of your ideas shot down in an instant without a moment’s thought, but just try asking him to throw out his three (plastic) bowling trophies from the '80s and see what happens.
So, what led me to this scrambled mess of a philosophy that will no doubt get me a morass of hate mail from my men readers? It was something that has been bouncing around in my head for a long time... you know, that little voice that won’t give up until you give in.
I am at a crossroads in my life; a good crossroads, but a complicated one. I have a lifetime of notions whirling around in head and the paths I can take are endless. I was feeling very grateful that I am one of those people who kept every good idea in her head for future reference. I even held on to the one about marrying Ringo Starr. He’s over 70 now, so even if he did ask me, I would have to evaluate whether or not he could keep up with me. I am against throwing away any of my thoughts, even the ones from the '60s. It’s those ideas that I have locked away for eons that will guide me towards… OK, I will say it… my Golden Years.
I can assure you that my Golden-freaking-Years will rock. And they will be blissfully peaceful, I can assure you. There is something to be said about keeping your worldly thoughts, experiences, and possessions stored away until the last chapters of your life. You have lived long enough to know exactly what to keep and what to throw away. Also, my priorities are changing by the minute and what is truly important is getting clearer and clearer. Thankfully, there is still a little time until I am an official old person, so I can still sort out and ponder each possible path with great care and attention. That little voice is guiding me with all the whos, whats, and wheres of the last and most glorious chapter of my life. I don’t have to hurry to decide. I am queen, so I don’t have to.
